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REm LA
Twelve o'clock check out we've got an entire hour
Where is the remote, no time for the manual power
DO REm
I put the name tag over the heart
On my shirt, that says 'Bob Rules'
I stood in line for days
With all the other fools
SOL RE LA
And then the voice of an angel that belonged to Rob Roddy
Called my name and said 'Come on down, you're the next contestant'
Oh my God I was hyperventilating
SOL RE LA LAsus LA LAsus LA
I hope I do not wake up from this dream;
Which is what it was
REm LA
Janice she slipped on wearing a diamond dog collar
Still in complete shock I muttered the words 'One Dollar'
DO REm
Everyone else overbid,
And their eyes turned to me with rage
For my dogs will be wearing diamonds
And I get to go onstage
REm LA
I picked up old Bob and I hugged him just, like a bear
He said 'Put me down son and feast your eyes over there'
DO REm
The sliding door was ajar,
I was a happy as I could get
For it was a brand new car--
A Chevrolet Chevette
REm LA
The showcase showdown was set for a quarter to noon
My spin did not make it all the away around, I got booed
DO REm
So I pulled down as hard as I could
Just like they all knew that I would
I was happy to be alive
When it landed on $0.95
SI SIb LA REm
Next thing I knew I was standing next to a Marine
Who did not like her showcase and passed it on over to me
Crunching the numbers I tried to remain calm
How much is an all expenses paid trip to Guam?
Before I could answer a banging came to my door
The housekeeper said 'You must leave now or pay more -- you have dog'
DO REm
I guess I fell back asleep
And slept right through that show
But the next time I'm in L.A.
You know where I'm gonna go
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